llaeyro: (Charlie/Teddy)
[personal profile] llaeyro
Title: If Only...
Pairing: Sirius/James
Rating: NC-17
Word Count: 200
Warnings: angst, frotting, outdoor sex, unresolved ending.
Prompt: “If I could do it all again...”, ‘confession’ and ‘outdoor sex’ from Day 16 of [livejournal.com profile] hp_may_madness.
A/N: Unbeta'ed. Caught up again =)

Also on AO3



He remembers it like it was yesterday.

Their game of chicken had evolved from a simple dared kiss to suggesting awkward teenage fumblings in increasingly risky places. He remembered dorm rooms, classrooms, various spots around the grounds and even just inside the Forbidden Forest. It was the Quidditch stands, however, that Sirius remembered most clearly.

It was the day their fumblings reached their peak. They were underneath the Slytherin stands, hidden from view but surrounded by the tumultuous roars of their schoolmates. He had James pinned to a wide support beam, kissing deeply as they desperately rubbed against each other through their clothes. James reached for Sirius’s flies, pausing, mischievous expression daring Sirius to tell him to stop.

But Sirius didn’t want him to stop. As their bare cocks slid together, Sirius didn’t ever want it to stop.

When they were panting and sticky, he held James’s gaze. “James…” he started, but the rest dried up in his mouth. “You fag,” he laughed, falsely.

Sirius stared down again at the photo in his hand—just them, laughing. He sighed, heavy with pointless, unresolvable regret.

“If I could do it all again, I’d tell you how much it meant to me.”

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